I'm having some problems with my mother-in-law and don't know how to approach or resolve these issues. My husband and I had our first child, a boy, almost a year ago. Ever since he has been born my mother in law has crossed boundaries countless times and I just bite my tongue so we all get along and I'm to the point where I can't do it anymore.
From the time he's been born she behaves as if she is the mother figure and always knows what is best. She not only gave constant advice when it was not necessarily wanted, but enforced these things when she would visit even when I didn't want her to. She would let him cry it out when I didn't believe in that, when I would want to breastfeed she would say "but it's not time" and try to prevent me from doing it. She tried to talk me into stopping breastfeeding at 7 months because my back went out and "I might need surgery". It was clear that I was going to get better and didn't need surgery. It's as if she's jealous of the bond I have with my son and she tries to prevent me from doing it while I'm there. There are countless other examples like not letting me hold or interact with him, passing him to others when he's crying out for mama, making sure she and my son are the center of attention at get togethers. The last straw was when we were at the fair and she asked to hold him and when she started walking away with him she said "you're too attached to your mom". Whenever I do get to hold him she walks right beside me, uncomfortably close, sticking her neck out and baby talking to my son. I can't take her controlling behavior anymore. I don't understand where her possessiveness is coming from. We live about an hour south of her but I come visit at least once a week, and I've let her have free reign when I visit because I want my son to be close with his grandmother but she's making me not want to even visit anymore. And just to make it clear, I feel I'm a pretty normal mother. I'm close with my son but I love him more than anything, and I don't feel it's in an abnormal way. This whole situation and the things she has said are making me second guess everything and feel insecure. I can't take it anymore and I would love advice on how to deal with this situation. Thanks.
From the time he's been born she behaves as if she is the mother figure and always knows what is best. She not only gave constant advice when it was not necessarily wanted, but enforced these things when she would visit even when I didn't want her to. She would let him cry it out when I didn't believe in that, when I would want to breastfeed she would say "but it's not time" and try to prevent me from doing it. She tried to talk me into stopping breastfeeding at 7 months because my back went out and "I might need surgery". It was clear that I was going to get better and didn't need surgery. It's as if she's jealous of the bond I have with my son and she tries to prevent me from doing it while I'm there. There are countless other examples like not letting me hold or interact with him, passing him to others when he's crying out for mama, making sure she and my son are the center of attention at get togethers. The last straw was when we were at the fair and she asked to hold him and when she started walking away with him she said "you're too attached to your mom". Whenever I do get to hold him she walks right beside me, uncomfortably close, sticking her neck out and baby talking to my son. I can't take her controlling behavior anymore. I don't understand where her possessiveness is coming from. We live about an hour south of her but I come visit at least once a week, and I've let her have free reign when I visit because I want my son to be close with his grandmother but she's making me not want to even visit anymore. And just to make it clear, I feel I'm a pretty normal mother. I'm close with my son but I love him more than anything, and I don't feel it's in an abnormal way. This whole situation and the things she has said are making me second guess everything and feel insecure. I can't take it anymore and I would love advice on how to deal with this situation. Thanks.
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